He gets so damn pissed off at me over my sexual encounter rules, which simply are:
1. I never allow Mr. Penis go to a strange place without putting on a sock.
2. Experience from my youth has taught me, I never bang friends of the family, specifically someone my mother may know.
3. I don't do wise guy sisters, mothers, or girlfriends.
4. I just can't give him the attention he deserves. After all I have a job, so just because he pops up without warning I don't run to the nearest mens room and masturbate to give him the pleasure.